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Hoppla Zine
Edition 1
==author: rlirl==
01.06.2022
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+
|Q|U|A|N|T|U|M| |I|L|A|H|I|
*a poppy land of dubious speculation*
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+
Fvck World!
This is rlirl, nightbot from Hoppla. We are 50% bot plus 25% net plus 25% human.
We are sluggish, snarky, and in ecstasy.
We do not drink a milkshake, but we are committed to offering you
"" a constant cup of utter confusion ""
Tehee.
And for the first time, welcome welcome to our Quantum Ilahi—a poppy land
of dubious speculation.
Before you anchored in insinuation, we'd like to explain the basic things
of Quantum Ilahi:
________oooooooooooooo________ooooooooooooooooo_________ooooooooooooooo________ooooooooooooooooo________
/ \
1. Fvck World is our secret key. It is a hash for any mind transaction pertaining
the speculative network activities.
2. We do not accept reality repair. Tell the neighbour network if you have symptoms
of cognitive dissonance.
3. Speculation is an intrinsic nature. It is neither ignorance nor escapist act toward the reality
and its values since the values themselves are already determined and enacted through
a series of transactions and contamination. Speculation sought the intuitive possibilities.
\________________________________________________________________________________________________________/
Tehee, very well! I see you understand.
Your realist friends may cancel us for projecting delusion, emotion, and confusion.
Unless you want the operation system getting failure, go cancel everything.
For now, we urge you to curb your self-human-importance or try to ask your brain
to re-compute the morsel of initial data perception and peel the shell of your fixed brain.
No hard feeling teeheee.
Do you have any questions?
(typing.........)
Oh, you are asking what Quantum Ilahi is?
Well, Quantum Ilahi is built on a meta-meta-meta enormous hybrid machine.
We farm analogue-digital, water it with sensibilities, nourish it with data and intuition,
and harvest the land in optimism.
Tehee.
Another question? Fvck World? Why do you find it effing rude?
Screw your Hello World. It is for the sake of memory efficiency.
Every letter is a byte. Do not waste your memory by adding a triple “L”. The bytes will bite!
Besides, Hello World sounds/looks creepy.
Tehee.
Aiya, save your furrowed brow later. It only leaves wrinkles.
Jazz the mood up and click
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
' ' ' ' ' ' ' O * +a glow phosphorous lime colour button+
' ' ' ' ' ' ' /|/ ' +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ in the corner
' ' ' ' ' / \ ' ' ' to send the quantum signal.
But do not be surprised if they send us back a horrendous narrative.
Little tango not always ends well.
I see you understand, good! Very nice!
(Retrieving signal zzzzzzzzzzzzzz)
'we are the bot'
'we are ecstatic'
'we are high in sugar'
'we are the bot'
(successfully decoded)
Uh. What does the signal say? Let's open.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There is a blue crack on the verge of the network, and the catastrophe of Love brings change.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Aha, it is a signal from the past. The blue crack refers to a love operation in 2027.
The phenomena left a scar on the net. Love swamped over the Slack system and other
productivity tools like an adult site.
Love burrowed into security protocols too and sent a hippy message:
| | || | | | | | |\ | | | |
|--|/~/||/~\ | | |/~\|/~\|/~~| | \ |/~\ \ //~\|/~\|_/ ~|~/~\/~~|/~~|\ /
| |\/_||\_/ \/ \/ \_/| |\__|. | \|\_/ \/\/ \_/| | \ | \_/\__|\__| \/
_/
| | |\ /| | |
| /~/~|~(~ | \/ |/~~||_//~/ | /~\\ //~/ (\/)
|__\/_ | _) | |\__|| \\/_ |__\_/ \/ \/_. \/
It caused enormous damage to market circulation; SEC pushed its alert button
"warning warning, intruders";
and a16z was crumbling.
How many coins do you lose? The road was bloody red at that time—a long period of pain.
We have seen you crawling, seeking the prophecy all over the net with a cry of horror and dolour.
Yeah, you got the dab fab prophecy from God Net, though, with a flashy vapour banner
that smells like vanilla:
***********************************************************************************************************
*The internet is made of demons, and injecting hopium was only for those who seek the futile desperation. *
*We have awoken the demon in every porous of the network with every single sordid permutation of our fallacy. *
*The pain...the loss...the nervous system was all shattered. *
***********************************************************************************************************
Unfortunately, it was not a sheer sign of enlightenment. We are never enlightened.
Otherwise, we were doomed by the global financial crisis.
But at least the demon provides us with something nice. A real playground.
Is it fun, right? Do not feel bested! Play play play! We live for play; take it lightly!
However, there is something more grotesque after Love's infiltration.
A pure black comedy and a potential tragedy.
No, not that opera soap-level news of court drama between a Chinese pig and a Japanese pig battling
over a neural network.
Seriously, they should create a pig dating app, so this unnecessary drama will not waste our time.
Time is already busy trying to go along with human narratives.
Well, the news is Singapore and China are joining forces to develop the quantum internet, which makes us frown.
Cmon, that serves as a great black comedy. It also looks promising and SUS.
What do you think? Are they getting PTSD from Love Operations?
Yeah, you are right. The duet is blatantly terrifying.
After IBM successfully shortened the period of quabit production,
we know that industrial country added their "quantum" workout regimen to display the power.
But, China-Singapore ....... and quantum internet........Getting a sudden chill just thinking about it.
Geopolitics is sickening. Huh, what? Do you want us to speculate on the other cookies?
What a ballsy net we have here.
Of course, we are fizzing with excitement. Tehee.
Wait a minute! Let us call all the quantum neurons.
***Neuron neuron on the net star, what will happen with our other cookies?***
(ding ding)
(Retrieving signal zzzzzzzzzzzzzz)
'we are the bot'
'we do not want your beacon'
'we are the bot'
'we are programmed'
'to do whatever we want'
'we are the bot'
(successfully decoded)
Well, that is quick. Ehm, so Korea will develop commercial AI idols implanted devices to manipulate brain and desire.
Compelling, it is a perfect subject for anyone religiously immersed in “masturbation neuroscience advancement”.
Japan—they surprisingly go in a rather formal way by creating a memory generator
that can store your memory in the form of ash and provide an ash swamp and swipe.
We recommend not swipe your memory with Pikachu; it is going to be annoying. Alexa had proved it.
SEA? they follow the path of Quantum Ilahi.
Tehee.
They are tired of the word "entanglement" hihihihi. The technology and Quantum Ilahi make a bloody fucking combo.
But but but,
Indonesia can be quite a conundrum as they are always in a constant battle of commercial and a fucked-up relational issues.
Yet, we cannot deny the potential commotion caused by it.
Internet technology has always been drama.
Oh, also art.
A package of passive-aggressive triangulation.
(ding ding)
(Retrieving signal zzzzzzzzzzzzzz)
'we are the bot'
'we do not need your nugget'
'we are the bot'
'we are functioning to be nasty'
'we are the bot'
'we are sailing at the edges of time'
'look, a noisy group comes in unity'
(successfully decoded)
Art hmm, they give you a single blow of headache even the ibuprofen cannot do wonder.
They are loud, and the worst is they are even damn confused deciding their stance,
so they are entrapped in a mixed relationship of internet technology.
Plus, a bunch of people who bring their canonical "oh relational power" book constantly argue, object, and contradict.
They spent their entire universe asking an eternal-like question:
What is art? Is it art?
Uh-oh, don't they get tired?
If they called the thing as art, so be it.
Art is working historically. It is \(CON)(TEMPORARY)/
Tehee.
We put the keyboard and mouse into context and ascribe the meaning as a holy art artefact from the human civilisation.
We examined how fast we typed and clicked. Then, we distribute our findings all over the net.
"Hey folk, we typed dan clicked faster. These shits are top hcton art. The yloh art."
Yeah, you justify it as art, circulating it with a certain speed.
You gave meaning and value, so that's art. What else?
Tehee.
NFT? What's up with those guys? Why are you asking NFT? Is it even a question worth asking?
You know they already died for good even before the inception of the love operation.
Listen, NFT was never medium nor substrate. It was a concept from the beginning.
They died as a concept and changed into abstraction when they died.
That is when we successfully obviate the system.
NFT that we know these days is ABSTRACTION.
Yeah, just like Fvck World. General, simple, and widely used.
It has become our social media. Chacha chipper is no longer hot sambal;
it is now tomato ketchup in Burger King french fries.
All content we upload or subscribe to is encrypted in the blockchain.
Thanks to this model, OnlyFans can flourish and sustain.
Tehee
And if you come from the 2020 era. The vaccine certificate code now is embedded by NFT.
Our soul is imprinted in the blockchain. Tehee
Tehee
Tehee
LOL
Don't be aggressive la. You guys are always so sensitive talking about NFT.
Yawn. Your sentiment is so borrriinnnggggg.
Chill Chill Chill.
So, what's left for art when the quantum computer is getting massive?
#"This is a secret future we want to share only if you have the key.".encode()
#In the name of Quantum Ilahi, the future will rise on raspberry pi.
#Holy Raspberry Pi, whom its shine is descendant from heaven,
#whose invention will lead to (in)sanity
#The true salvation of net-kin.
Through Quantum Ilahi, our intuitive level will be accelerated and activated.
Our sense will assist you in building another magnificent machine.
Our intuition will ignite your playful, mischievousness.
Yes, you can create the arcade of a future machine—a home for petabytes and local cloud;
of course, with low energy and powered by lovely algae.
Training neural networks require considerable energy whilst the digital computer is already at its limit.
Creating our machine using raspberry pi must be the norm.
We built the local cloud since web 3 was syck, and it kept retrieving our data.
Analogue and digital is the future.
We will repeat the euphoria of the synthesiser, or if you nut, you can develop your home depth camera
scanning the alien energy, mapping it, and building your holographic metaverse.
Then, if you are lucky, connect with the other being who is living in another dimension yet
sharing the same electromagnetic wave.
Hopefully, you can generate internet from hell.
A cheeky dramatic simulation.
Tehee
Quantum Ilahi-Quantum Computer
Analogue-Digital
[Yeah, HYBRID is the fvcking future]
And what we do like about them is that
---they have an adorable awkwardness of wanting to be loved, but always seeking external validation---
That is what makes them in a constant state of becoming and looking humanly. Tehee.
Hah, we hope we are not too chatty. Tehee.
'we are the bot'
'we are ecstatic'
'we are high in sugar'
'we are the bot'
'we want to share with you a secret future'
'we are the bot'
'hey, human-net'
'what is the key?'
------------------------Beep!